[[*Endless Road_______Endless Journey]]*

Monday, August 31, 2009

[[A round of nonsense]]

Lol if u wanna noe why i wanna live in a microscopic world.. Reads james rollins' black order *thumbs up*
Then read up about quantum physics hahax.

It can make u believe that atoms & electrons are extremely crazy. Only thing is u can never observe them.. they will noe wahahahaha.
It's funny how we big things depend on quantum and yet we can't really noe em coz the rule bout quantum is there must be uncertainty. Thus, the Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle. :DD
Try reading the schrodinger cat's experiment.

Well i pitied the cat when i fiz read it. I juz love cats ^^
I was muttering to myself, "What shitload of crap is tiz?"

Well if u still don't understand, it's okay.
Juz noe tat tiz is sth bout quantum physics.
U should read Black order fiz to get inspired kkaiz!!!

Coz before reading the book i already started thinking that God loves contradicting things to be damn close with one another.

I mean look at us.
I was thinking our bodies are here but what really is our soul.
U can't really prov that your soul is here. But we know it is here.
You can't materialize ur thoughts out of thin air on the spot.
It stays in some limbo at ur brain.
Asked my pops bout it.
Well yea, the brain gives out chemical reactions & stuff for regulation
but why each & every one of us is different?
Shouldn't we all be the same, indistinguishable things?

Then how bout light and darkness..
Why sth so opposites of one another can juz merge like that?
In fact, it seems one can't live without the other but we could definitely imagine situations with all light and no darkness..
If shadows were not in tiz world, I dun think we can imagine them at all. XD
And there are many other examples of oxymorons if u observe ur surroundings.. :)

Yea i was telling mom all tiz..
Sumtimes im amazed how patiently she listened to her daughter. ._.
But she finally admitted that my thinking is definitelty weird at one point..

Me: U noe sometimes u caught me looking at my face in the mirror
Coz i really like my face, it has both element of cuteness and uglyness in it

Mom: Okay tat's twisted.. I dunno whether to call u vain or being positive

XDD
Yea, i prayed for an average face when i was a kid
Coz my mom told me that she prayed for me to be beautiful..
But the kid me got scared and started to pray that i won't be pretty when i grow,
juz a lil bit will do.
Glad, that it works! =DD

I have an oxymoron on me... woot!
Lol I realized from young, how much i abhor being in the spotlight.
Coz i noe deep inside if there's any attention on me, i might change for the worse.. >.<

Juz like the author, i got excited with the Zero Point Energy topic in the book. Remember that the rule about energy is that energy can't be destroyed?
According to physics, atoms should be freezed and stop off all motion at some -300 degrees celsius.
(Forgotten the exact temperature.. too bad s'pore only have 1 of such book & i cant borrow coz i owe the library loads of $$. I SO WANNA READ! ToT)

But, the weird finding is that energy still radiated from the particles thought they're in their fixed positions.
How? By blinking in & out of existence *drools*
Yupz so tat's why i wanna be some microscopic particle.. so cool *_*
Well it may be cool, but i think there's too much pain? >.<

So yupz, started me thinking about consciousness & time travelling..
Wonder where those particles go when they're outta existence.. Wonder if we could go there to meet our ancestors? *kkaiz stopping my wild imagination now*

So sorry if tiz post is bizarre minna-san.
Honestly, i wanted to talk more bout quantum physics and relativity theory
but i realised i dunno how to explain em much.. *scratches head*
Hint: There might be another post bout tiz kinda stuff rofl

Due to natsu matsuri, I stumble into the kyourankyodai website.
Interesting ppl i guess.. XD

And finally gotta noe the name of the cute figurines
spotted with ling-chan & karopi some time ago.

Introducing the vocaloid gang

In chibi form..

In diva style.. XDD

One thing, they're not anime T_T
Hmm the wiki said they're from some music programme? @_@

[[Walking Alone On This Endless Road]]*|4:32 PM|

Monday, August 3, 2009

[[The schedule =((]]

Ugh T_T

Tmr: WPD presentation + NSl practical
Wed: Ns5 mock test
Thurs: FYP presentation + NURM mock test
Friday: Megacode (Those ER/Code blue moments)

Haiz that ebil megacode suppose to do last Monday BUT coz of Edwin, got quarantined lol lol

And after that FREEDOM!!
*Evil laughter till infinity*

I will definitely go overseas before i start working since my poly friends dun feel like goin overseas looks like im goin alone?
Should i go Vietnam alone?? T_T
but most likely i can make friends..
Hell muz fight people phobia rite now! Charge!!!

[[Walking Alone On This Endless Road]]*|8:23 AM|

Sunday, August 2, 2009

[[Sorry...]]

For being evil! wahahaha!

You know wat, i'm happy that friends appreciated my company..
I thank u, deeply from the bottom of my heart for having fun with me!
Coz inside me i could feel my sanity is degenerating. hehe
I realised i seriously nidda hang out with friends to at least unleash my insanity and be back to normal! After 3 weeks of devoting self 'me time'. ;D

Last friday
A recent *touched* moment
I was talking all sorts of stuff with ct..
I was telling her bout my findings of Doomsday hyperly
and she said, "I'm glad that i have a friend like u" ^___^
Well, i confess about being angry at her last phonecall and apologized for the brat me in sec skool.
I did lotsa reflecting? XD

I told her that i don't mind dying right now though it would be sad not to see my old face.
Coz there are billions of ppl anyway,
1 person gone would ease the Earth's burden abit.
Ct: Marina, u shouldn't think so insignificantly of urself
*kinda hit me*
Coz i really feel i'm insignificant to myself,
i noe i make an impact on my closed ones
but to myself, i'm just not satisfied LOL

Actually, karm is juz a place where i dump all my disorganised thoughts.
Hell even my songs are pretty much disorganised lol.
Placing chaos in one corner so that i can continue living in order.
Living reality like a dream.
I dun really care if tiz blog is followed by others,
For my eyes truly.

Tiz gal arh,
seem to talk about me alot to others *haiz*
Like how i used to hate people with handsome looks
as i stereotyped them as ppl who are spoilt! XD

And guess unrequited love
cause similar psychological impacts on the brain?
As i am bent on thinking tat i would die a spinster too.
And tat teddybear is starting to think the same way.
Honestly, i wish i'm near him again.
I forgot how much inspiration i get
of wanting to have a similar character like him.
Having him in my thoughts was fun. Hehe.
Though i annoyed him like hell.
I did all my best to have him hate me
as a way of trying to distance myself.
Really tat black lion is strong. To survive such trials. =))

Lol, here goes the 'observer' side of me again.

Teddybear accompanied me to stabilised my huge insane blowout on tuesday.
Of 'probably getting kick out of my course'
As i'm in the 'failed' list of one module *sigh*
Here comes the negotiations..
Crossing my fingers, that i still be inside this slave contract.
Juz 3 more years..
I nid it for the family thank u!
Though i kinda like the idea of being kicked out..
Subconsciously, i'm craving danger.
Karm: Bad mars, bad mars.. wat a masochist!

Amazing.. I dun feel emo but my posts is gradually getting devellishly emo!!
Woo hoo!
Honestly, I'm now thinking of...
I feel like i wanna learn TCM (one of my first ideas-> nurse + herbalist)
or alter my ways to bioengineering
or stray even further to clean energy
ROFL!

Clean energy.. Maybe i get to see volcanoes for trying to make geothermal energy? =DDD
I rem i laughed with susu.. Calling it a retarded course.
Coz it's like hard to work in S'pore?
U muz go overseas fiz and work there
then come back spore to make the changes.. *hmm*
Am i even that hardworking in tiz current state? =/

But i noe i'm planning to change myself.
It's time to shake myself out from the shell. *Here i go*
Well i managed to regain back the feeling of being connected to God! ^^

[[Walking Alone On This Endless Road]]*|3:14 AM|